Parity - Week 11 Highlights

Best Chirp: "You're masters age, not dead!" said with the scorn only Justine can manage when someone doesn't bid for the score. That someone? Laura Knowles.
 

Best Catch: Owen caught a disk off his bum! No really! There's video evidence! Somewhere! Right here!

https://youtu.be/uTBY7oon9QU?t=407

No wait, that's Owen getting handblocked (for Adam MacDonald related chirps, please watch that video for another 20 seconds). But Owen really did catch a disk off his butt. Matt, where's that video? It happened in your stream of the first half. I rewound and rewatched it last night like five times, sipped a bit of bourbon, and nodded appreciatively at the TSN highlight.

Next Best Ass-Play: Mehmet decided he wanted to ruin Dan Thompson's monday, and made him bid. Dan made a great catch! But Dan also burned a very big hole through his compression shorts (he basically mooned the sideline showing it off). Blessedly, we do not have video evidence of this.
 
Copy Cat: Sina almost threw a disk around a light post for a score. His target? Ashlin (of course). Was he successful? No. But we're still all calling it "homage". 
 
Notable Stats!: Did you know that Nick Therieult got credit for 7 D's last night? Steve Bisang had a night without drops? That Matthew Kerr had 7 scoring touches on 11 total touches in his game? That Marc Vachon had 6 in 12? That Kindha Gorman scored 4 goals?
 
Worst Way to Start a Tuesday: I imagine Megan Berry, who took a disk in the eye. Megan, can you please confirm for all your fans that you are alive and well?
 
Nicest Way to Start a Tuesday: Stacey Wowchuk sent me an email! She told me how sad she was that this thread wasn't available for her to start her Tuesday morning. She even expressed concern that I might be dead! This parity coordinator was very touched by this. Stacey, you get a cookie.
 
Best Stats Keeper: All of you. All of the stats keepers! You are all wonderful people and we love you.

Notable stats: Nick Theriault also had 8 throw aways! The last one, on the last point of the game, had me lose my mind so bad that I barked that he "owed me a D". He proptly poached the lane and spiked the disc vaguely in my direction.

It was a great play and goes to show that I should be much meaner to all of my teammates.

Best: 100 extra volunteer points to Chris Bergman who played an early game, flipped the scoreboard for the third game and did the stats for the late game. And he has a cold. Hero.

Worst: Me and Stephen, stats fail. Credited Anne with a drop that should have gone to Nick. She was WIDE open going deep, so naturally Nick came to help her, causing an almost collision and a mutual drop (touched by both of them). He should get a "D" but since it's his own team mate, the "drop" would have been better. As stats keepers you are watching the disc so saw Nick as a late and unexpected guest to the catch, plus things moved really fast after that so no time to "undo". Fail. Apologies to Anne, Nick you owe some fantasy dollars to Anne next game, maybe set her up with a second assist from you.

A stats keeper who wants to correct a mistake they feel they've made! We'll make the change and it will be reflected in the stats/salaries when completed.

When something similar happened to me, I just yell "STOP TURNING THE DISC OVER SO FAST, YOU ALL LOSE MONEY" and forget there was even a possibility that I could have messed up the stats in the furious contest of throwaways.

Indeed Kris has been volunteering a lot - his volunteer points (you can keep stats on anything in this league!) are passing or approaching GMs, who all started with 20!

For future stats volunteers - don't volunteer too far into the future, or if you do check the schedule when you get traded and adjust as needed.  Otherwise you might leave someone a little bit lonely with a tablet....

 

 

Wait so how do these volunteer points affect Sina's bottom line? Does this make me more or less affordable? One of the Parity League's great mysteries.

I can confirm that I am indeed alive and well.  The eye definitely looks worse than it feels with some nice bruising keeping it colourful and looking badass.  Luckily my glasses cover the worst of it and no one at work has noticed.  Though I can't say the same for the people at the gym this morning who avoided all eye contact. 

I think we should mention James Maeng for a great slide catch to keep his team in it.  That was possibly the TSN turning point for his team.  

to Katy Parity.

At one point in the game, down 4 points, destroys in the 2nd half with a win by 10 points.

 

 

*LIKE*