Parity Week 12 - Highlights and oh my god it's trade week.

Submitted by Christopher Keates on Tue, 2016-02-02 01:42

Forums:

Things happened!

Foot Fetish: Dan Tompson went for a footblock and Andrew Cameron (his teammate) was trying to cover a clearing cut. Andrew moved so close to the handler being covered that Dan kicked him. Dan spun like a top and fell down.

Jon Pindur, in his inaugural Parity debut, footblocked something on the goal line. I forget who it was, but the sideline loved it. Good job, Pindur.

Loves The D!: Speaking of Pindur, did you know he had 6 D's in his first week?

But....: Did you know that Jen Cluthe had more with friggen 7? You didn't. Now you do. Jen Cluthe is a monster.

Worst Chirps: Andrea Proulx tried to heckle Stacy Wowchuk on a layout. Justine Price, who has been laying out since before Proulx was born (zing) disagreed with Proulx's assessment of Wowchuk's form (which was spectacular).

Parity... Achieved?: Two ties, two games that were won by 2.

I Lost a Bet: I owe Mehmet a beer.

Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics: Also Oxford commas.

1. Andrew Cameron was only credited with 4 throw aways which I am pretty sure is crap.

2. Mehmet and Nick Theriault had 8 which I am pretty sure is just about accurate. Mehmet, when you drink the beer I owe you, please do not miss your mouth.

Tim Kealey

Tue, 2016-02-02 03:19

Ashlin held to only one goal?!?! Katy Parity must've played some good D!

Jen Cluthe

Tue, 2016-02-02 08:27

Kirsten and I had her on lock down this week!

Alessandro Cola...

Tue, 2016-02-02 07:03

My teammates prefer I didn't throw two directly out the sideline, get hand blocked on two hammers, or let Chris Tran waltz into the end zone unguarded.

Oxford prefers the comma after the second item, not the conjunction.

(Unless we're trying to make this read like William, Shatner's, acting, I guess.)

Stacey Wowchuk

Tue, 2016-02-02 08:14


My layouts are real. And they ARE spectacular.

Alessandro Cola...

Tue, 2016-02-02 09:25

Like.

Amos Lee

Tue, 2016-02-02 10:24

I would like Stan's team forceably renamed to "Drop it like it's Stan" ... hell even "Drop it like it's Staaaaan" would be fine. Just someone recognize Stan's ability to throw wins away.

Andrew W Cameron

Tue, 2016-02-02 10:38

Yeah, I was running pretty hard following my mark and saw no Dan in my path.  Suddenly with a picosecond of warning, there was a Dan in my path.  Amazingly, no shoulders or adductors were harmed in the process (awaiting 'morning after' confirmation from Dan).

I would NEVER chirp the stats keepers.  If they say I only had 4 throwaways and no throw drops, it must be so.  Case closed.  See you next week.

P.S. Solid layout by Wowchuckski.

Christopher Keates

Tue, 2016-02-02 10:49

Really I am chirping myself. Oh, also:

Best Chirp: Andrew Cameron threw the disk away and then yelled at himself, "GRRRRrrrrrrRAAAA Come ON Andrew!!"

A few touches later someone else threw it away. The sideline yelled "Now yell at yourself in the third person!" 

Alessandro Cola...

Tue, 2016-02-02 13:26

Speaking of Andrew W(K), I completely forgot to mention catching a pass as he bid and nearly got the disc. As he was getting up, I showed him the disc to gloat, looked to the endzone, and promptly shot a laser beam of a flick STRAIGHT OUT THE SIDELINE fifteen yards from my intended target. 

The hecklers on the bench made sure I knew how hubris actually works.

Chris Sullivan

Tue, 2016-02-02 11:06

Ignominious had all 12 players record at least one D this week (credit to Trevor for finding the stat).  Next week we plan on getting a mac line going and getting 12 Ds on one throw.  We just need to find someone in the league who sometimes will throw a field length huck four feet off the ground without noticing an entire team standing between them and their target.  If each team could send one nominee to Al that would really help us plan.

Ariel Untiveros

Tue, 2016-02-02 11:49

I can only think of one person and that's Al...Maybe you should trade him

Trevor Stocki

Tue, 2016-02-02 11:59

I had to look up mac line:  here is a video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPs8Y9KEwgE

To me it looks like volleyball added into the mix.  Spike, bump, catch (well catch isn't vball, but you get the idea).

Trev

 

Adam MacDonald

Tue, 2016-02-02 13:12

if there is a Mac line without a Mac in it does it really count?

Steve Bisang

Tue, 2016-02-02 12:25

The reverse happened for Katy Parity this week.

We were up by 6 goals on a crazy rampage (credit to JC... not Jesus, Jen Cluthe) , and then Sina's team took a time out came back and scored 5 in a row (credit Katy shitting the bed). 

Then a real game ensued.

 

Adam MacDonald

Tue, 2016-02-02 13:13

Bisang if i am going to turn your name into a culture sweeping phrase you have to lead the league in drops so get on that your slipping.

Christopher Keates

Tue, 2016-02-02 13:38

How do you function as an adult, writing as you do?

 

Adam MacDonald

Tue, 2016-02-02 14:33

Poorly, also the term adult is being used in its loosest sense.

Steve Bisang

Tue, 2016-02-02 12:50

In the first play of the game, Amos leaves his foot off of the gas and let's a Callahan opportunity gently float past him.

Amos Lee

Tue, 2016-02-02 15:49

I'd like to thank Greg Probe for the opportunity that I didn't take. And yes, now that I've collected my award.... I'M GOING TO DISNEY LAND.

edit: My captain would like to contest the presentation of the award to inject his self-nomination of his drop on the last point of the game (Stan legitimately asked me to remind everybody of this... I don't know why). This would be the second time in 3 games that Stan has singlehandedly changed the outcome of the game to the detriment of his own team. 

2nd edit: And now Stan tells me he's ACTUALLY GOING TO DISNEY. Meanie takes my vacation destination and now wants my award. #getoffmylawn