Parity Recap the Third: A Week of Firsts

Another week, and we move one step closer to achieving parity! Trades were made, and the obvious result will be tighter matchups, closer games, and more balanced play! Yay parity!
 
So I'm looking at the scores and the first game of the night... oh my. Oh my God, we have a parity first. The Rudderless Pirate Ship won 34-6. This is the most lopsided loss ever in the history of Parity. I was struggling with how to write about this in a manner that ddoesn't hurt anyone's feelings, but turns out I don't have to. John Haig did a fabulous write-up here: https://www.ocua.ca/node/9831
 
This week has also had a number of other firsts. There's a second pod cast here: https://www.ocua.ca/node/9828 and in that thread Justine awards the first ever Hall of Fame Hughes Award to Rachel Ng, although in doing so it appears we've descovered a Parity conspiracy burried deep in the codebase of the app being exploited for Alex Bush's nefarious goals.
 
Heads Up Defense: If everyone here knows Christopher Sullivan, they also know that he has ridiculously large hair! Rumour has it that the hair got a defense on Monday. Take notes and skip the barber, people!
 
Point And Shoot: Rumour also has it that Newman was cutting up a storm, pointing and gesturing for his handlers so they'd know where to throw it! This is good, communication is key. However it seems like Newman occasionally pointed to space, the handler threw it, and Newman didn't go there. Fred was a victim of this a few times (and I have some experience with Newman doing similar things). Newman, for reference, misdirecting the defense only works if your offense is in on the game.
 
Bid Watch: Logan had a full-extension layout D on a shot into the endzone, saving a goal. Edwin Wong, layout to save a scoober. Al Colantonio, layout for a goal. You guys, I love it when you hit turf!
 
Hammers Time: Hey guys, Dom can bomb it. 40 yard hammers are in her back pocket, and she is ready to give them out. Somebody out there is on her naughty list for dropping one this week (you know who you are), but maybe you can get back in her good books by catching it next time.
 
STATS
 
GOALS: A bunch of people had 5 goals this week. Notable on the list, Adam MacBeard, Alix Ranger (highest scoring game so far this season), and Dan Thomson who got back to being a cutter this week). Putting up 4, notables include Celine, Edwin, Giulian (who is quietly showing he can score), and Liam Parker.
 
ASSISTS: Wildgen put up 8. Justine is back to her tricks with 7, the same number Parity New Kid* Lance Blackstock put up in his first game. The Pirate Captain Travis steered 6 into the endzone. Mehmet had more assists than throwaways this week, with 5. Kristie Ellis settled into her role as handler and put up her best game of the year with 3.
 
D: Travis had 6. Given the lopsided performance and the comedy of errors that was his opponent I largely believe he didn't work for any of these. Jessie put up 4 D's, and so did Matthew "Skynes" Schijns. Kate Achtell put up 3, more than her partner Kelsey (who didn't play, I think from the shame of last week).
 
THROWAWAYS: John Haig had 8 total on 31 attempts, which is almost as remarkable as his post about it (tipped hat goes here). Al Colantonio had 7 combined, but almost half (3) were drops! Trouble on the Sticklers? Fractured locker room leading to subtle rebellion against the captain? The most remarkable statline of the week in this regard is Will Reid. He had 1 throw away and 4 thrown drops. Will, your receivers need either a talkin' to or some bribing (Fred, Hadrian and Spearin also had more thrown drops than throwaways).
 
DROPS: Dom had 3, so I am assuming her team throws her garbage a lot. Will Leckie had 3 and I know his handlers never do him favours.
 
PEWPEWPEW WATCH: The covetted Pewpewpew award goes to the person who throws the disk away the most, and it's still Jessie at 18, with Mehmet and Owen 2.0 trailing at 14 and 13 respectively.
 
BISANG WATCH: The leaderboard for drops this year looks really weird. CA, Jaime and Laura Storey have 5 each, but I don't expect this is reflective of what it will look like after 12 weeks. Sitting close on their heels are names like Dom Rioux, John Haig (after the worst game of his frisbee career), and Kevin Barford.
 
Interesting Stats
  • Travis Davidson had a triple double (3G/3A/3D) with 3/6/1/6
  • Hadrian had a Berry** and had a really strange looking game with 2/5/1/4 of the happy stats then 2/3/2 of the sad stats. Lance, Alisha also had a Berry. Simon Berry did not.
  • The highest weekly salary on Katy Parity this week was Greg Probe, at $58,000. Nobody was negative, and for those of you familiar with the general goals of the system and the salary structure, this is a good indicator that the system works!
  • Hope had a quietly perfect, mistake free day with no throw aways.
  • Edwin put up a 4/1/1/2 night making all kinds of absurd catches and plays that had the sidelines on the edges of their seats.
 
* new kid as of this week, it was his first game! Welcome, Lance!
** A Berry is named after Simon Berry, and is an achievement of remarkable mediocrity. You must get at least 1 of each stat: goals, assists, second assists, D's, catches, completions, throw aways, thrown drops, and drops. It is much harder than it looks.
 

In the late game, Seb had the disc on his endzone line and I think tried to fake a flick.  The disc slipped out of his hand and wobbled to the ground, but Train somehow came up with it. And proceeded to turf it. Classic!

For the record, it wasn't an attempted fake, it was actually an attempted huck (which is worse) and had zero rotation since it came out at the begining of my "throw".

Thanks Keates! Always love these updates (good and bad - clearly need stickier gloves lol)! Some additional news - I was the bounty winner for the coding exercise (lol, it was pretty challenging but cool!). Announcing the trade - the winner is Lance B. Lance B is a force to be reckoned with out there and has explosive energy. Squashing the ridiculous line up of Keates, Brian P and Lance. How did that even go through to begin with? The trade is to be enforced followning next week.

Here were some of my other considerable mentions: Hadrian (for his luscious hair - causing all of us ladies on Stack Over Flow with increased drops haha :P), Brian P (for the stacked lineup and killer salary), and finally, the pirate following the dramatic results of that game (that is if he wasn't a GM). With the leagues luck he will miss a critical playoff game to give us folk a chance haha :P! Cheers!

My team is 1-2 and I won a game by all of 4 points with Lance. How "stacked" am I?

You're getting so much side-eye right now, CA.

I'll take the side eye hahah - having played with most of your team members - I know they are all extremely talented and it was only about time that you started crushing it. I think some of the earlier losses could be attributed to the team finding its groove. I would take the trade as a compliment - that is that I recognized the imminent threat of that handler line and had to make the trade. Good thing we are more than parity friends hehe :P

You show remarkable loyalty to your GM, who would trade you in a heartbeat if it would make his team better.

1 - All is fair in the game of parity and trades

2 - I'm all for trades - I wouldn't be offended if I was traded (although breaking up the couple can leave some bad juju and extra gas expenses lol :P)

3 - I just want to win - this has nothing to do with GMs lol!

Look forward to more banter lol! Perhaps on Slack- now that I'm with the IT squad hahahaa

We can also settle this Saturday at GLOW (I hear there will be wrestling matches)! hahaah :P