Parity Public Service Announcement: Volunteering

Hey all,

I know it's been a while since I've blasted your eyeballs with Parity hijinx, but I wanted everyone to know that I still <3 all of you almost as much as I <3 Parity and parody of Parity.

That said, there's something important we need to talk about: volunteering and how we treat our volunteers. Real talk time. This league functions because of the volunteers who make your on field successes and failures a persistant, stat-trackable, analyzable reality. Without people on the sidelines pushing buttons and following the game, the gimmick breaks.

So I want everyone to consider being one of those people who pushes buttons or narrates the play. It's easy to do, it's pretty social, and it's fun. It also makes the Parity world go round.

How do you volunteer, you ask?

Go here!

What are the rules for volunteering and stat keeping, you ask?

We have some guidelines here!

That's the easy part. Here's the hard part. Be nice, respectful, and helpful to the volunteers. Don't heckle the volunteers, because they are giving up their free time and putting in work for you. Don't complain if you feel they got a stat wrong, because sometimes things happen fast or on the opposite side of the field from the volunteers. If the volunteers ask you to do something small like hold up a hand if you're doubling or pause the game so they can catch up or correct a mistake, do it with a smile and don't grumble*.

Doing anything other than the above is a very easy way to make someone feel unappreciated, pretty much ensuring they never do it again, which means it gets even harder to get people to volunteer. Instead, give them hugs and cookies. Who doesn't love hugs and cookies? I happen to know Ali loves hugs and cookies, and I'm 95% sure most of the rest of the people who stats keep do as well.

So volunteer! Say thanks! Bring cookies! Make the Parity world go round.

*Special call-out to someone who shall remain nameless who heckled stats-keepers last week, despite my ctrl + f not finding their name once in the stats keeping sheets. Anyone who does this going forward is going to be shamed and pilloried on the forums for it.

EDIT: Parity is all about active consent, so get permission before giving hugs.